Sunday, 9 January 2022

Name calling

 


David Clancy had an unhappy time at school. Today he is a grown adult but he still remembers the names he was called at school because he was different to the other boys and felt like an outsider. Other children called him "Nancy Clancy". When David was young, the word 'Nancy' was used to make fun of boys who didn't like 'boy things'. We don't hear that word today in 2022.

"I wasn't very good at football or sport and was more creative... I remember crying to my mum about it as I felt so ashamed."

Forty years later, David has opened a hair salon in Cumbria, England, and he needed a name for it. He says today some of his friends use the nickname 'Nancy Clancy' but they use it with love and he likes the name. He decided to 'reclaim' the name he used to be called and use it for his salon.

David said he was a little bit worried about what people might think and wondered if some people might laugh at him again. He also thought the sign might attract homophobic graffiti and considered covering it up at night. But he realises those thoughts only came from a feeling of 'gay shame' and  since putting it up, he has only had positive responses; "People loved it... they walk past and take photos."

David has also had letters from people he went to school with forty years ago, asking if they were the ones who had been nasty and saying sorry. 

- why does name calling hurt some people so much?
- why did the name calling make David feel so ashamed?
- David remembers the name calling in to his adulthood; why?
- what were the 'boy things' that David is talking about, what do you think might have been considered 'girl things' at the time?
- you don't hear the word 'nancy' in 2022, why not? (because people understand more about boys and girls being different and not having to behave in a certain way)
- why do you think David and his friends started using the name 'nancy clancy' when he was adult, why didn't it hurt anymore?
- why do you think David used the name for his salon?
- David talks about 'gay shame' making him think he maybe should not use the name. What do you think 'gay shame' is?
- how do we remove the existence of 'gay shame' from people's lives?
- why do you think people David went to school are writing to him today to say sorry?
- what can we learn from David?
- why is this about No Outsiders?


www.no-outsiders.com



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