A better dad

 

https://goodmenproject.com/families/to-the-other-dad-on-the-playground-the-day-my-son-wore-a-pink-dress-wat/?fbclid=IwAR1_1GL-Thu_5RciTCOGMJrhgtUtsZxg_nbVrQ7od0gZem1QSUhdaKLd_Jo

A letter from one dad to another went viral after it was posted online. The letter described an incident on a playground where a little boy wore a dress. The little boy's dad watched as his son, wearing a dress, approached two girls and was rejected, but he also heard their dad's response. The boy's dad wrote a letter to the other dad. The full version is in the link above; below is an edited version for this assembly.

Dear other dude at the playground on Saturday,

I couldn’t fight the need to write you about an incident between our kids. Remember me? I was the dad with the son wearing a pink dress. Before he burst onto the playground, and as I parked the car, he was positively vibrating. I asked, “Now…you’re sure you want to wear your dress?”

He shouted in response, “Yes! Because I want to show everyone how beautiful I am in this beautiful dress!” It was a big deal for him; and for me. He hasn’t asked to wear a dress “out,” before. I didn’t fight it. Who cares, right?

Or so we’d like to think.

As you noticed, he couldn’t contain his excitement showing off the dress to the only two kids playing…your daughter and her friend. He skipped and twirled and chased them for ten minutes shouting, “Do you like my dress? I’m wearing a dress! Can I play with you? Will you play with me?”

Your daughter and her friend were obviously older and uninterested in welcoming a new playmate. But my son continued, “Do you see my beautiful dress? It’s a Sleeping Beauty dress!”

Then my reticence was confirmed when your daughter walked by me saying to her friend, “I don’t want to play with a boy in a dress.”

I admit I wanted to trip her.

But when your daughter said to you, “Daddy, that boy is wearing a dress,” your response was... 

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stop here and ask the children to predict the other dad's response 

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your response was a pure gold moment, for me: “Well…you’re wearing trousers, aren’t you?”

I was touched and surprised by your compassion. Like you, I just want my kids to be happy. So, thank you.

Thank you for showing my son support for his choices. Thank you for bringing more acceptance to your (understandably) inquisitive daughter. Thank you for encouraging my son’s joy.

You helped me be a better father, in turn.

Thanks, dude.

Daddy Coping in Style

- Why does Dad address the letter to "the other dude on the playground"?

- How do you think Dad felt initially about his son wearing a dress to the playground? ("are you sure you want to wear a dress?")

- He hadn't asked to wear a dress "out" before, "It was a big deal for him and for me" - why?

- "Who cares, right? Or so we'd like to think..." why is dad saying in this line?

- Why do you think the girls did not want to play with the boy in a dress?

- How did Dad fell when the girl walked past him and said she didn't want to play with a boy in a dress?

- What was the response from her dad, why did he say that? what does that show about how he feels about a boy wearing a dress?

- how did the other dad's response make the boy's dad feel?

-"Thank you for showing my son support for his choices. Thank you for bringing more acceptance to your (understandably) inquisitive daughter. Thank you for encouraging my son’s joy." How do those 4 simple words (well, you're wearing trousers) achieve all that?

- "You helped me be a better father, in turn." - how?

- why do you think the boy's dad didn't approach the other dad on the playground to say thank you at the time?

- what can we learn from the boy in a dress?

- what can we learn form his dad?

- what can we learn from the other dad?

- why is this about No Outsiders?

No Outsiders: Everyone different, Everyone welcome by Andrew Moffat

www.no-outsiders.com